Bye Paul

A wonderful day today. Clear blue skies. We rented bikes and rode for a few miles down the beach path which threads down this coast, It sticks pretty much to the line of the water but veers off to go through nature reserve woodland running at the back of the beach.
The light coming through the trees. The warmth and the feeling of pushing through air gave a wonderful sense of freedom and of being alive.

In contrast... I pondered on the sad news we heard this morning of the death of Sue's sister's first husband Paul. He was only in his early fifties. Struck down by cancer. I didn't see him much since the divorce but of late I had bumped into him in hospital and doctors waiting rooms as we shared an illness – Deep Vein Thrombosis. This was just another cross he had to bear.

The last time I saw him was at the doctors some 6 weeks ago. If I had not have known better I would have said he was in the rudest of health. Sun tanned and slim. The subsequent collapse must have come quickly. He told me then he had but a few weeks to live and that he was looking forward to the end. To get out of the misery of the pain.

So I thought of Paul as we rode this morning and I thought... enjoy what you can whilst you can. And like Paul, do no harm. I cant say I have ever met a soul who didn't have a good word for him.

There are not many you can say that about. An achievement in itself. I doubt many of us will leave this world with people thinking so well of us. Certainly not me. Bye Paul

Great ..........Fa Kin Su Pah

The hotel we are staying at is a bit flash. I don't say this to be boastful but to highlight just how surprising was the little piece I read over breakfast today.

The napkins, nice crisp starched black ones, were wrapped in a paper ring so as to present a clean crisp image with the elegant cuttlery and fine glasses on the table. You get the picture.

. I took off the paper so I could drape the napkin over my lap – messy eater, but croissant crumbs do get everywhere. Anyway half way through my first bite of croissant and slurp of coffee I noticed the paper napkin ring was printed with the words “Learn Chinese in 5 minutes”. This was in English obviously.

I read on and sat there mouth agape... Here is what it said word for word..

Thats not right ....................................... Sum Ting Wong

Are you hiding a fugitive? .....................Hu Yu Hai Ding

See me ASAP .......................................Kum Hia

Stupid man .............................................Dum Fuk (!!!! Do they know what this means)

Small horse ............................................Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach .......................Wai You So Tan

I bumped the coffee table .....................Ai Bang Mai Fa King Ni (!!! Bloody hell)

I think you need a face lift .....................Chin Tu Fat

Its very dark in here ...............................Wai So Dim

I thought you were on a diet ..................Wai Yu Mun ching

This is a tow away zone ........................No pah King

Our meeting is schedule for next week ...Wai Yu Kum Nao

Staying out of sight ................................Lei Ying Lo

He's cleaning his car............................. Wa Shing Ka

Your body odour is offensive ................Yu Stin Ki Pu

Great .......................................................Fa Kin Su Pah

As we were writing this a man who we thought to be the manager came and talked to us. He was in fact the owner. We said we were surprised at his napkin rings.He said he did what he wanted with his hotel and he thought this would be fun.

You just have to love these Swedes. Political correctness. Just what is the Swedish phrase for that?

Lets hope the Chinese ambassador doesn't drop in – or perhaps he should.

No English Tourist Disease for the Swedes

Southern Sweden is empty - not of places of interest, good hotels, friendly small hospitable towns, but - of people.
It's mid July. The sun is hot, but thankfully there is a breeze so it feels cool. There are literally miles of beaches and they are empty! It' has the population of an English coastal strip in mid winter. Where are they all?

People around the world do the same things on beaches. So it's no surprise here is no different. Kids play in the sand and the sea. Parents make fools of themselves splashing about but there's just less of them. Is this the norm I ask myself?

Handful's of blonde kids, uncovered in the strong sun, are rushing up and down being just like kids everywhere. Why don't they burn? Why aren't they covered up? The Swede's don't seem to fuss in the same way the Brits do. And with the preponderance of white haired kids here you would think they would.

I should tell you where we are. We are in a spa hotel in the seaside town of Ystad on the southern coast of Sweden, in the Skane region. We are here for a few days. The hotel is right on the sea front and our room, on the 4th floor, looks out to sea. It has a Juliet balcony so we shall sleep tonight with the doors wide open listening to the sea as it laps against the sand. Very soporific.

My first experience of Sweden outside of Stockholm has been surprising. Excellent and quiet roads, where driving seems to show the lack of fuss seemingly indicative of this nation, get you from A to B in an unhurried but safe manner.
It's not swingingly expensive like Copenhagen – at least 30 to 50 percent above UK rates – but around UK rates for the standard of service provided. Fuel is costing about the same as the UK or slightly cheaper.

Most English folks have little or no other languages, and if they did Swedish would not figure highly in their choice of second language so it's a good job English is spoken widely. We have found nobody yet who could not converse with us in English. That says a lot about the Swede's desire to be included in a world where Swedish is not widely spoken. And even more about we English who just expect folks to understand us when we speak.
It does make reading road, and other signs, a bit of a bugger though. You just have to give it your best guess. So far that has gotten us through.

I was impressed by a cash machine today that read our card, understood it was an English card, and delivered the interface in English. Of course I have no way of knowing if UK machines perform similarly but it really helps the foreigner get to their cash... so if they don't they should. Excellent accessibility even if the machine itself was more than a bit scabby.

The main tourist draw around here is that it “Wallender” country. A bit like Oxford is the land of Morse. Wallander novels are set in and around the town of Ystad. I have watched a couple of the series, at least the English version where Ken Branagh played the title part. I have seen nothing I remember except perhaps the cash machine we used today in the town square.

So what have we learned from a small sojourn into Sweden? Well it is a lot better than you would first imagine. It's a great place to get away from the crowds and frankly from the raucous behavior of the typical British lout/tourist. Sweden still has that quality lost so long ago in England and other parts of the world to “English tourist disease”. A disease which is both contagious and destructive. I cant see the Swede's catching it – ever. Maybe they understand the difference between quantity and quality in life.. Cool. Just cool.

And Oh yes I forgot... I wished we had brought the Bromptons, the folding bikes. They would have been so useful both here and in Denmark.